...obeying the voices in my head...

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Excerpt from the Diary...

Was just browsing through my ol' diary which was aptly titled 'Diary of a Madman' in its front pages. It feels awesome to read some of this old stuff which I thought I had forgotten, and there are some pages that embarrass me so much that I just feel like tearin off those pages...but memories shall be memories. You can't erase them.
This is one of the days that I just came to browse upon in my diary.

Warning: I even used to write utter crap 2 years ago. If you have read my blog then you are already immune to the crappiness.

25th May 2005
Hey boss, here we go, 3 2 1...
->Its funny how u make promises of commitment. The sad part comes when you've not acheived half of what you should have done. Promises may be easy to make, but it takes the crap out of you to maintain it. The reality of life is quite bitter to what your dreams you build yourselfare.You always dream of heaven, the the stairway to heaven is much harder than the escalator to hell.
And what for all the lazy people like me could do more, than sit and float towards the place where the devils waiting with his trident. Everyday I make a promise to myself, 99% of them are fake and inneffective, the rest is govt. tax (whatever!!). I make a promise that the moment I get up the next day, i'll be good as new, a changed person. Who would start taking in knowledge untill his brain explodes. Theresult - I wake up next day dreary eyed...finding something to spend time with, other thatn watt is actually my objective.
Coming back from the
Philosophical Blabberrer...
I dont have tutions for Chem and physics (which apparently makes people's eye pop-out!!). The reaction I usually get is "ARE YOU OUTTA YOUR MIND??" I wish my anwer was not "YES". Unofrtunately it is. My determination or commitment is not gainin an inch to what must have gained 3 feet by now. [ I'm stuck in a boat, because the anchor is laid but i'm too lazy to pull back tha anchor, so I cant ride with the breeze. And at that time the other boats have gone far far ahead of me. Though I dont want this to happen, this is watt I am. I sit, I rot!]
But everybody has great expectations from me. They think I work.
I Ajay, Hereby pronounce myself
Guess I dont get a medal for that. And meanwhile jinal crawls into IIT. I, Ajay, Master of Dust-mites and flies, (crap)...sit and rot.
Hail to the master...Let's Shit on him.
[Whatever that means!!!]
Sleepy now.
Signing off.
N that was what I was.


Dagny said...

a nice insight on waht u were, years ago!

"memories are memories, u can't erase them" well said!

Ajay "NRkey" Menon said...

Oh!! thank you milady!!

Jinal said...

Greetings to the knight and the damsel in distress.(D.I.D) from the mindless traveller. by da way nice blogpage though a litle on the darker side (read "sucidal") ... nice.