Cyclic

Morning. Alarm goes off.
Multiple snooze abuses.
Moments later you grope for the light to shine in.
Pupils adjust to the sudden rush.
Contemplate the day in a few seconds.
Generalize the day in terms of good and bad by the way you wake up.
(Wrong side of the bed maybe?)
Am I late? Rush.
Am I early? Sleep more and get late. Time does know how to fly in hibernation.
Brush. Feel the few neurons of your head get stimulated with the acidic "freshness" of your toothpaste.
Stand beneath the shower like a frozen statue feel the cold water trickle down your body.
Stand. Dry.
Ready.
Turn to the watch. Seconds passed by.
The rut of commute. The desensitization of long minutes/hours and the dense populous contorting inside boxed wheels.
We suffer, yet we barely know it...conditioning matters.
Rut in the office.
Work. Sit. Yawn.
Count the productive gaps and the "breaks".
Prepare charts and sheets.
Type like manic fanboy in front of a screen.
Clickety click goes the fingers tap in synchronised choreography of eyes following the mouse.
For a moment the second hand of the analog clock freezes when you notice it. Physics?
Wrap up. Contemplate the day that just passed as the totality of your existence.
Have I made a change to this world today?
It's the way home but there's no drive that makes you want to necessarily go there.
Yet it's a race and reaching early can be an achievement unlocked.
Wading through traffic of humans and cars. Millions around but this story is about you. The one you.
Wipe the last of the plate onto the sink...taste buds confirming the repetition.
Its a symbolic representation of the day coming to end. The music diminishes gradually to a lull.
Feel constricting time quickly tapering off any sign of quivering activity that would act as an unforeseen epiphany. Life changing?
Lie in bed. Evaluate. Question self worth. Deem yourself lazy.
Tomorrow will be a better day.
There's a rockstar ending to this and it's coming soon. Isn't that what stories teach us ?
The senses shut down. The world around whizzes to a black point.
Fin?

Deja Vu

You want to find differences in life. Variations. You're in a constant search for them.

I thought we get bored of stuff easily. Hence our intense fascination to move on to different things always remains. But then our brain wants simple diagrams...simpler structures to work on. It wants to boil down every bit and byte of information processed in the cortex to churn out cognitional understanding.

Boil it down to the basics. But there's the path of least resistance. We want to go by it....without straining ourselves. Without burning out. Ease out. Relax...slowly let the subconscious take most of the load. That's where the repetition comes in.

One Fine Day

So what is it that makes you human?

Your emotions. Your tendency to react. React in what seem to be the predictable patterns graphed out through the years that are said to be human psychology.

What happens when you don't react to what you're supposed to.
Or react in a manner totally unexpected.

You're inhuman.

We are scared of things beyond comprehension. Hence when things don't go according to plan. We panic. Coz there are no contingency plans. Its sudden and harsh and unplanned. And that for some is not meant to be. Things have to fall in some certain groove defined by previous experiences so that some sense of familiarity works as a transitioning agent.

But then when things do not flow in a certain streamline fashion, people have to question the occurrence. Because frankly speaking...people are lazy. Mentally. Complexities force them to think. And that requires a certain amount of flexing the mental nerves in order to act.

It's like a math problem or a puzzle given to you every time. At a certain point you can derive the "fun" from it. But then your brain starts to fatigue. It need's to "cool down". And hence we have rest. Sleep or whatever it's forms. We need breaks as in to not suffer from the wrath of having a burnout.

[Written at a subway while multitasking gluttony, random thoughts and aimless plans for the day/night]

What have I become?

Blog Spasm

There might be a few things which fascinate you in life and hence motivate you to wait for the next day before you sleep. Pray for it to come soon so that you can embark on another eventful day.

Would that be a complicated day ?
Does an eventful day have to be related to complications ?

As it is said people do want a simple life and want to live freely and in a land of peaceful bliss. But then what.
Consider you have all that you want. Lying near the beach just relaxing and knowing you have to do nothing to earn money or respect. You're full of it. You run out of challenges...then what?


- Random Thought after a long time

Had to post something to keep this blog alive.

The Last Snore Bender

There are times when life's decisions are to be made with pure impulse and instinct. When that gut feeling exudes from your solar plexus with the feeling of pure conviction. That split second thought in your head and your decisions are made. The right ones.
Then it happened.
The Last Airbender!

If anyone asked you to describe the experience of watching this movie you'd stammer your ass off since it is then that you realize you feel the complete lack of a knowledge of the sheer number of expletives you might need to verbalize your feelings. In a nutshell it's like being told by the oracle that you're the chosen one, and hence you're all happy and dandy walking down merry street. When suddenly she calls you up and adds an important fact that you're the chosen one to be taekwando flying kicked by 37 red assed baboons who are wearing spiked heels on their new shoes while kicking you in the balls. Oh, and plus you're naked. That's when you tell the oracle what to shove up where.
The only difference here is that there was no oracle. The kicks to balls were much of a surprise.

When last year the promos for the movie came out, I was in awe. I waited like a 16 year old twilight fan who waits for edward cullen to sneeze in her general direction just to share something 'personal and intimate'. That's when the posters and the trailer/teasers looked compelling.

Now how cool is that!

The story is based on a popular nickelodeon series named Avatar:The Last Airbender. Now since Mr.Night Shyamalan knew he'd be thrashed big time if he went head to butt with James Cameron for his monster 3-D epic, he removed the 'Avatar' from the title and thus saved himself from a T-1000 attack.

If it is any consolation to you, even jake sully found the movie repulsive.

Jake Sully's reaction on The Last Airbender

The story revolves around four nation Earth,Fire,Water and Air nations living in harmony till the...wait for it....THE FIRE NATION screwed things up. Some shit about the spirit world and this world and that world. I'm sorry but I couldn't make out from the people snoring in the theater. Hence people need the airbender called the avatar, who can bend all four elements. He is thawed out from a 100 year cryogenic slumber by a water chic who can 'bend' water and the comic(?) sidekick dude. Now the trio stir shit up freeing people from the enslaved fire colonies because they want to restore balance to the world, save the rainforest or some such shit.

[Interjecting comment:
Q. How did people know Katara(the water chic) was pregnant when she was bending water?
A. Her Water Broke!
]

Now the avatar kid hasn't done his training yet. So he needs to learn how to bend earth,fire and water too. The Fire nation don't like that so much. Coz that would lead them to this :



Fire, Air and Water...check. Guys I need some earth now please!

So the fire nation wants to stop the kid now and bag him so they figh. Blah Blah. The spirit is killed...love is sacrifice shit...i have no clue. I think they could've finished the movie a bit earlier by introducing captain planet fucking shit up and teaching you about proper garbage disposal and recycling.


The guy who made me was seriously color blind!

Still if you do plan to watch the movie I would suggest you watch the 'deadly tape' from The Ring. At least you get a 7 day notice. Hence that relatively would be a slower death than The Last Airbender.

I leave you with Haley Joel Osment's famous words on watching the Last Airbender:


I see dead people...but it's better than watching this movie!

20 seconds

When there’s a gun pointing to your head, you realize how meaning springs into your life. A sense of predefined purpose which was lost in all the cacophony of living the life “they” wanted you to live. Can you still comprehend what the true desire is? Would you know what you and only you wanted to do in this life. Do those things that come purely from your own desires, without any influence from an outside force. Can you feel the individuality of your purpose?
When there’s a gun pointing to your head, do you feel the insides crack? You feel your arachnophobia or the agoraphobia is now invalid. You are embroiled in the totality of fear, ready to defend your own self from any pinprick of unseen circumstances. Fears melt down to one single existence. The perceptions change from a person who took life for granted to a person who feels the extreme importance in those imperceptible things, the ones that do not come within your definition of life. The little things you tend to miss out while compressing your life in a few flashes before your eyes.
When there’s a gun pointing to your head, what difference does it make? Your hollowed existence sticks out to scream at the insufficiency that you led till now. You never tasted life. You kept it on the side so that you can build and keep building more structure to your life, so that at the end of it all when you feel you have earned it…that’s when you indulge. But why wait when the reward is right in front of you? Why toil to earn it? Do we need to be awarded tokens of acknowledgment from what others think of us? Are we that dependent on others in shaping ourselves? We fail at living. Coz we forgot what it means. It’s now a memory beyond recall. Maybe.
When there’s a gun pointing to your head, whom do you think about the most? Do you think about the love that filled your vacuous existence? Do you think about the ones who loved you? But then why would you think of anyone but yourself. Why think about those who are soon going to be memories? To cushion the oncoming blow by the memories that you thought were “unconditional” and “pure”? Is it that hard to not see yourself reflecting on each one of your actions? To verify how unconditional they were and measure the magnitude of purity that was so obvious. It withers away. It’s not the cynicism, but the harsh reality that you can only be the one person. The one and the individual! Only one.
When there’s a gun pointing to your head, how many questions tend to…
“Done thinking?” The gunman smiled.
“I don’t…I….Not quite.” I stutter.
He slowly moves his hand with gun in his firm grip. His hand slides to his left still in the air. His sleeves flay in the violent wind that lashes the empty landscape. His eye twitches and the right corner of his mouth goes up to take the form of a malicious yet benign smile.
“Do you think this was a joke?” He yells. His face calm.
“I didn’t get the time to think about that.” I regain my ability to speak.
He takes a few steps back. The left hand was still in the air, with the gun pointing west.
His index finger touches the trigger. Even though he was far I could sense the pressure that he applied on the trigger. I could feel it as if it was me doing it. The weight of the gun was in my hand. The bullet that was lodged inside the gun was waiting. The pressure builds up. The trigger was not light. He had to bend his hand to add slow pressure to the finger. My elbow twitched. The trigger was suppressed, but only half way through. It was on the threshold of release. A door was to be opened. Freedom.
He clamped his teeth together with a look of intensity. My jaw was taut. There was an instinctive propensity to release the gun, but my hand shivered. He pointed it at me now. My hand was hovering near my head. The threshold was here. He was not. I was.
The pull was not hard. The gun was a trigger now.
Click.
Silent and Black. No vision. No tunnel.
Just a distant hum escalating as it came nearer. The Doppler.
The upsurge. The crescendo. The climax!
I fell. But I felt it. I felt the ground. All was black, but I still felt the ground.
I fell…and my left leg was the only part that was on the bed.

The Mallu Interview : Part I

[Recent Interview that might not have happened.]

Interviewer : So then how does it feel being a fraud mallu?

Me : Well, feels nice and dandy. * gleaming smile*

Int. : Ummmm...I was expecting something more actually.

Me : Well to be frank it's an oddly mixed feeling of an outsider coupled with the superiority complex of the fact that I come from a land where the literacy rate is more than 90%. *smug smile*

Although the 'I come from a land...' storytelling startup line is highly irrelevant being born and brought up in the land of cotton/groundnut/'dry freakin state' called Gujarat. And as my only

links to the land of coconuts/backwaters/shakeela are my intermittent yearly commutes to meet my relatives down under. south.

But still, as Charles Unnigopalakrishnan Darwin once stated the famous adage, "Once a mallu, always a mallu!". And hence here I am feeling like a mixed bred, something like a Dachshund, except for

the fact that I don't look like a sausage. But then you arrive at the definition of what a quintessential mallu is like. Since the non mallu demographic would answer that with a mild ramble on the

stereotypical qualities such as a person who is dark,has weird springy hair,pronounces the word M as 'yem'...so on and so forth. But then I would warn people to not to fall into those misleading

and gross assumptions which are mainly targeted at various people for the functioning of this...

Int. : Thank you sir.

Me : But I was ...

Int : Moving on. Did you ever feel out of place living outside of Kerala?

Me : No. Nein. Nae. On the contrary, the instances where I have felt most out of place have been in Mallu land itself. But that is because of the fact that people expect me to be a true mallu over

there and hence that load of expectations makes me self conscious and ergo, makes me feel out of place. But to think of it, there have been times when the gujju populous had dumped me due to my

being from an other state. It might seem primitive, well yes...but this was way back when I was 8 and I was doing these convulsing retarded dance steps at a garba thingy. The mocking laughter that

my gujju compatriots were thoroughly involved in was met by my uttering the defeated war cry 'Amma!'. Talk about sticking out like a sore thumb. *laughs ostentatiously*.
But all in all, I couldn't think of a better place to be in. Except maybe the Bahamas...or Switzerland...or Paris...or Alaska...

Int. : Being a Malayalee yourself, do you tend to mingle more with other Malayalee's? How is the interaction like ?

Me : In a way I have never thought about this much. I never think, 'Hey this guy/girl seems to be a mallu, lets go talk to him/her loudly in Malayalam'. No. I don't do that...and most mallu's

don't. Fraud mallu's that is. Unlike Bongs and the Reddy's we(Fraud mallu's) don't seem to be all that comfortable with our own language that much. Not that it doesn't sound good and all. Ok maybe

it doesn't sound all that great. Not like it's french or something...but still fraud mallus have those parasitic qualities of blending with the host rather seamlessly.
Ok that was a bit of an exaggeration.
That language itself is pretty extensive and confusing. Hence people's 'Teach Me Malayalam like right now' requests are often met with teaching 'What's your name?' in malayalam and leaving it at

that or yelling, "IT HAS 53 LETTERS MAN! WHAT DO YOU EXPECT??".
But my observations have been that most Fraud mallu's turn out to be in those elite classes of people. People such as... *wink wink*

Int. : How was your childhood affected?

Me : Oh! I was slashed with whips everyday by non mallu people and then I was frequently thrown out of schools. I was going to be fed to the sharks at a point by my teachers...well in short, that

is one freakin dumb question!

Int. : A recent article states that Kerala scores the highest alcohol consumption among all other states in India, what are you thoughts on that?

Me : Oh damn! Seriously? Well being in a dry state this is something that...oh god...alcohol...consumption...ummm...do you by any chance happen to have some with you, like right now?

Int. : I beg your pardon?

Me : Ahhh! Nevermind. Well as such, alcohol is a really precious and rare commodity. It's a dry freakin' state man. Ok in some ways that is good. We don't have drunks lying around on the road at

like 7 in the evening. The womenfolk are safe to roam the roads. People here start and end a fight by just pointing fingers at each other. Ummm...well people might call it a sissy place, but hey

it's home right?

Int. : And what about the alcohol, sir?

Me : Appy fizz. Mind over matter. Hope you get it.

Int. : We'll take a short break then?

Me : Certainly!

Cure

There are days when things aren't going your way.
There have been such days.
Yesterday wasn't one. But that doesn't mean it doesn't matter.
Although yesterday was tiring. In what way?
Hmmm...well I have been pretty social, those are from my poor standards so that might not come up to the collective standards of social-'ness'.
But then I had to roam around pleasing people from every hang out invites. And hence the wandering nomad was 'busy'.
Felt drained at the end of the day. A bit strung out in a way.

I reach home.
Slouch on the big leather cushion that was my sofa.
Making random contemplative thoughts in my head in order to keep it busy from the withdrawal symptoms of being suddenly idle.
That sudden emptiness strikes you then.

The thing that happens at the end of a big event. Yes it is technically a withdrawal syndrome of a euphoria of a passing event.
Like goin on a trip with friends for the weekend and then suddenly getting back to work on a monday.
That feeling.

What could be the cure?
I am no Doctor Phil, but then a voice from a kitchen beckoned me.
An invitation to the dinner table.
And there it was. The cure, on the table.
No ayurveda. No homeopathy. No allopathy.
Three words: Mom made Spaghetti.

And that was it. The joy was back in my eyes.
(I think a tear rolled past my cheek).
And I was jumping like a six year old who got the remote controlled car he wished for.

Minutes later I was wiping the plate clean (which is considered pretty rude in China, or so I have read)...the foodie high was on.

-
Spaghetti Junkie

Shopping and the art of standing like a coat rack

So there I was, in the womens section for ethnic wear. Staring at all shapes and colors of cloth cutouts designed to look whatever their definition of "ethnic" was. My sister was in the trial room for what seemed like hours to me, or probably somewhere down the line my idleness was so causal that it tore through the fabric of space-time creating a localized worm hole thus trapping me in a time loop of painstaking idleness.

All my idleness didn't go in complete vain though. I was proud to learn a thing about myself - I have PATIENCE! Although I don't know the collective magnitude of what and how much of patience justifies the word to be written in caps...but hey, I do have it.

The thing is I had to play the role of the faithful driver for my sis who has a deadline for her shopping dates and items. I prefer chauffeur...no wait...I prefer being called the transporter. Gives me that Jason Statham-esque Mercedes driving image kicking some ass on the way.

Which is the exact opposite of what I'm doing right now.

Now one thing I noticed is how women shop. When when you see a woman shop...you realize that men don't actually shop. They pick up stuff. Shopping is this whole art consisting of various sub branches and psychological nuances and all sorts of meticulous data you can put in. And my sister is not a woman when it's shop time. She has the masculine ability of getting bored while shopping...and that too within the initial few minutes. Although this would go in the 'pros' list when it comes to me being the 'transporter'...her methodical perseverance and dedication is a total let down thats scrawled all over the 'cons' list.

The following observations are on the various women I have observed shopping while standing like a dork in the ladies section.

-Women come.

-Go through all the sections once.

-Think about all the sections.

-Think about what others would think about the clothes in those sections.

-Short list a few clothes in order to give some hope to the guy who works at the store.

-Shatter his hopes by rejecting all the clothes that the woman had just short listed in order to experiment on a fresh batch.

-Through this process the locations do change from one shop to another.

-There is no accurate finalization...only and approximation of what they think is close to perfection. This condition is highly dependent on whether they find the 'Ohthatdress!'.

(The 'Ohthatdress!' usually occurs when women spot some dress which is something that they were predetermined about since it would have been worn by someone else such as a friend or a celebrity...or some influential woman)

-After the process which spans a few hours that casualty report might consist of only a handful of or no particular clothing. (If the budget is not an issue the woman might come out with bags weighing more than the woman herself). [m_woman>m_{bags when tcurrent time>>tsaturation]}

[note:1. This is a vast field of study, my points are a crude generalization of my own observations.

2. These points are strictly limited to shopping of clothing, things like cosmetics and perfumes require yet another flow chart though the process remains somewhat the same.]

The pick it up men method :

-Go to shop.

-Go through all/most/very little of the stuff once.

-Decide on the basis of budget first, then liking.

-Pick it up.

Finish.

It may seem I'm being violently sexist here, but I condemn none of the methods. Both are equally bad in a way. One is too meticulous and the other has the complete lack of it.

There has to be some fine balance.

Hence my conclusion is if you go to shop...go with a gay dude. That's a balance.

The blogger returns...again

I've been having a massive case of writer's block lately which has catapulted me into this unwanted sense of laziness to pen down not even a single thought running through my head. After half an hour of the mental anguish of making decisions no matter how trivial they may be, writing this post has been a result of some tremendously redundant over-thinking.

First things first, this is not the first time. As observed from the frequency of my posts, which have a tendency to appear as spasmodic bursts scattered unevenly on the blog time line I have no such pang of regret on being irregular.

Deux. I have been feeling pretty disconnected with a few people including the mental personification of this blog lately for unknown reasons. Well the more I delay my 'confession time' acts the less is the probability of it showing up in any conversation (even the ones I have with myself). So even sharing a thought has been rendered a sinful deed somehow with the whole screwed up moral and conscience issues in my head. I'm already the Ebenezer Scrooge for this winter it seems.

Tres. I have been through a lot lately, and with each passing chronicle, which I always plan to pen down on the blog... it ultimately results in failure to launch. And sadly I think I forgot more than half of what I was to write.

Well one main thing that has happened lately was playing and touring with a band. Although the word 'touring' maybe a bit of an exaggeration, it still counts legit.

The two places of the tour have been IIT Kanpur and BITS Pilani. Two of india's top (10/20?) institutions. Between the two band competitions we had a 5 day stay in Delhi which was an adventure in itself. There were some really great times when we would end up laughing so long as to literally rolling on the floor with our hands over our stomachs...to the times were our faces would be painted with all shades of melancholy and loss. Met some really great people, whose lives put in one word I would gladly confess - envious! On the other hand there were people with attitudes and egos the size of which would have been a highly arduous task to measure.

Though one point clearly stood out,which is nothing new actually, about the fact that I always tend to mingle/interact with people older than me. The fact that after a point in the 20's the age gap(usually ones of 2-10) years melt down and doesn't matter much, or so I have observed has some part to play...but still I have a natural affinity to a more mature populous. Cough, I'm 21 dammit!

The one good thing about these band competitions and the people in it was the fact that in our country the whole "rock scene" and the participating people are a pretty small minority. And that somehow tends to bring people together. I was on the bass for these two shows and my bass guitar failed me twice by refusing to let out a single wavelength of sound. And the best part is both these times we had some or the other rocker playing the role of a good Samaritan willing to lend us a bass guitar for our performance. The first show in Kanpur when the bass died down, the winning band(Weapon Shop,Kolkota) volunteered to help and lent us their bass for the gig. There were band members who we would talk to, give wishes and hugs to and still not know their names. It was that feeling of belonging and being one with the whole crowd where you need not be afraid to express who you are and what your choices have made you. There was this mysterious sense and feeling of freedom. Although it wasn't all love and roses as it sounds.

Then there were times when I got piss drunk and FUBAR, which as I look back now were some pretty hilarious scenarios. Went through some really shitty times right after that, which I guess might just be a notch above the thin red line that says 'barely mentionable things'.

The travel, which somehow seemed a lot more than it should have. The boredom and the stagnancy of a commute.

And as for the one thing that was constant throughout - the bandmates. The four of us were an eclectic mix of different backgrounds and age groups, the youngest being 17 and the oldest 27 but still bound together with the same way of music and some disastrously unthinkable jokes which somehow managed to entertain a wide audience of people.

Well thats all the verbosity I can afford for now!

8765 hours

A month from now my college going days will soon be crashing through the finish line. Although I've still got a year left, but the last semester is a project/training semester (or so we are informed!).
A month! Come to think of it thats nothing compared to the last three years I've gone through.

Then It hit me. Three Years.
So much has happened within these three years. Yet at this point all I can hear is the rapid whooshing sound of the years passing me by.
Which again struck me as an ironic fact! I was never really all that fond of my not-so-perfect alma mater. I have been pretty vocal(well,in blog sense) about it on this post three years ago. And now here I am. I actually remember writing that post. I remember that each day of college in my first year...regretting each time I stepped off my college bus. The College entrance always had some symbolic congruence to Lord Sauron's Mordor, which was totally...well partially a mental projection. Each long day, counting how long it would take to get out of there. Each minute which lasted an hour, an hour that went on for a day...you get my point.

Again I come to the point of Adaptability, how things started changing once I started accepting what they were. I tried to rebel out by giving entrance tests again in my first year...I got a few places in B'lore. Something stopped me back. And the fact that I did not regret it was the best part.
No, not coz I started liking the institution a lot more. Frankly I still resent the way it still runs. But then I had to embrace the crap within and carry on with whatever that was around me. Life went on.

36 months have passed by.
After being through all that shit. The depression I caught on the first year, the smoking, threats of getting detained due to low attendance in every sem, the absence of any real tutelage, the people who weren't on the same plane of understanding... and then I got used to it.
Thats actually an amazing thing about human nature...put in any rut where things which might be of intense dislike, we get desensitized^*. And it happened well. I was numb to all of it...it barely mattered then.

And here I am, at a point where my status has metamorphosed from 'growing up' to 'grown up'(actually that point is still on debate with my parents).Am i actually standing on the precipice of taking 'that plunge' into the big bad world?

I remember a year back I was talking to Dagny, having a conversation about the same thing when her going to college days were about to end. I still remember how I was talking about it and projecting myself on that situation. Somehow when it comes to projecting the past or the future we tend to romanticize things a bit more that required. But those evolve to dreams, don't they?

I have no clue what lies ahead.
I can't say I am prepared.
But I'm just a Dreamer, and I'm good at it!

---

^* - not everytime

Verbal throw up

When was the last time you felt low?

When was the last time you felt like things were in your grasp and you let it go?

Feeling ignored?
Frustrated?
Deserted?

I knew what things are and where they belong. Yet there are some things beyond our control. Things which cannot be changed. And then you have to stand and face them for what they are. It fascinating when you see the halo...but then it fades to black when you spot the horns.

It's actually tempting to fall in love. To go to that feeling of being cared and caring for. That big soft huge ball of happiness innocuous as it may seem. Tempted to share. Create a bond.

But reality know where to hit. That ball only had the outer coating of happiness, maybe its hollow or bitter inside. Who knows?

I'm scared sometimes of how dense my thoughts become.
But I'm happy for that fact that I can see something without clouding my sense of judgement (for the moment).
Things can never be absolutely partitioned in a good/bad happy/sad way.
The spectrum is what intrigues me, and exploring it is fun I guess.

[Please note that the post has been written in a soporific state. Incoherences might be very common and complete absolute accuracy would be totally accidental.]

Random Thoughts

Thought(s) 1 :

Moral Perception -

The most ambiguous yet ubiquitous property. A person's conscience has a great deal of affect over his/her actions effectively prodding the evermost pertinent/trivial question of 'What is the meaning of life?'. Could be considered as a crux of a relationship. The congruence of its properties could be or is the most vital thing linking a set of people.

Example :

"I could actually kill someone to have that chocolate cake tart!!!"

"Here...I had the knife in my bag. Just wipe off the blood please!"

"Ummm...ok!"

Ok, maybe not a valid example. But get's the point through. Doesn't it?

Familiarity -

The art of finding commonalities between a person and another person or an object/place. Familiarity is a comforting component to the recipe of 'inertia of (drastic) change'. A violent or extreme change would heighten a person's senses to find the most familiar substance/property around him/her. Change might bring inexperience along with it and so in order to find that already attained experience a person resorts to finding familiarities. Things looks less clueless then.

Example -

Going out for a drive to someplace and finding a classmate who you barely know, and yet greeting him/her with the warmth of a friend whom you have known since long. (possible hyperbole used)

Knowledge -

A superior fundamental element which changes with perception and would be best understood as a "common understanding" of observations. 'Ignorance is bliss' is a superflous adage just to the comfort of people who were/are too lazy to acquire that required knowledge or too intimidated to face the blatant reality of what it brings.

Example -

"Hey! You're playing the wrong scales. Sharpen the last note and the third last so that its an A Phrygian and the next chord would be a diminished not a minor!!"

"Eh? IS that even a language?"

"I'm telling you what I know. Period."

"Ignorance is bliss!"

Thought 2:

Although there is almost everything you have in life for the taking, achieving all that's possible and impossible. But the things in life which you can't have are the bitter pills to swallow. We are always told that nothing is impossible. It is the best encouragement statement there is, which would motivate people to unachievable targets and people get through. But it also shatters the fact that you can't always get what you want which is built to high expectations with the previous "encouraging statement". Sometimes what you have and what you want can be two really mutually exclusive things!

Jaago Grahak...Jaago

Yaaay! Elections are over.
Yaaay! We Have a new UPA government.
Yaaay! Manmohan got new glasses. No he didn't. Just takin the excitement a notch higher.
Yaaay! Rahul Gandhi...something about youth...blah blah.

OK SHUT UP!

For those who consciously bared witness the ushering in of the fresh new UPA (or is it?) government without the usual love-hate "allies" latching on, it might indeed be good news for India.
We have no Laloo in the Union cabinet. 
Mayawati's not the PM. (like you were gonna! HA!)
CPM made a mark through its campaigns similar to what Bhojpuri movies make in hollywood.
Congress in Uttar Pradesh(!!!) because of Rahul Gandhi's strategic(/purely accidental) tactics.
BJP with the same fate as Virender Sehwags hair. (BALD PATCH AHEAD, buy new caps ASAP)
Blah blah...I can go on about the aftermath.

But the thing is people praising about Manmohan's Singhs greatness. Making him sound like a Superman who eat's Kryptonite for breakfast. "The most responsible, calm, intelligent..." and what not cliches used to describe his victory. Ok yeah! We get it...you won. But lets not go overboard with it. 
You've seen the visuals on TV. You be the judge. I mean look at the man! He looks like a senile lost rabbit who just forgot where he put his carrots. And you surely know who has all the carrots right?
NO?

Lemme give you some visual aid.
(Also, lets play a game here.)



SPOT THE DIFFERENCE :

"CARROTS! CARROTS! CARROTSS!!!"

"I have THIS huge a box of carrots for you Manny! THIS HUGE!"

First of all, If you think I took the first photo and flipped it horizontally and changed the hue-saturation levels...you are certainly thinking what I thought in the first place. But sadly thats not the case!

Before you scream, "Thats a bloody Carbon Copy!"...may I interject by pointing out that these are taken from the times of India, two separate issues. So next morning you wake up and see the same thing maybe flipped vertically, don't act surprised you might see a lot of similar photos through these days at different angles.

Coming back to the content...look at the guy. Do you even remotely think he's taking his own decisions. I bet even when he wants to go to the loo he might ask Sonia Gandhi, "Ma'am! May I go to the bathroom!".
I can give you more photographic proof but that might make me look really desperate about this whole thing and plus i guess these two are good enough to make a point.


Oh and yeah! Also the tale of the brave knight Rahul Gandhi himself. Now since the guys at Times are as jobless as me they asked celebs on what they would expect on a date with Rahul Gandhi...
(how do these guys know what we want in the papers man...i bet they have a mind reading device!).

I wont jot down the whole thing, but here are a few quotes:

Sonam Kapoor : "If I do get the chance to date him, I would spend the time applauding his courage in trying to lead our country..."

My View : This is a clear indication that Sonam Kapoor know squat about dating. Imagine you doing that on your date. Your guy/gal walks in and you start applauding like a maniac who lost his/her freaking mind, your date covers and rolls to the nearest exit. Thanks Sonam!

Shveta Salve : "He is half-Italian and half-Indian. So even the date turns out to be as cheesy as a lasagne, I’m sure he will have the tadka of a dal fry to spice it up! "

My View : Off all the sex euphemisms you could use, WHY THIS! Why?? Although few brownie points for thinking that up. I'm seriously getting some screwed up visions about this one.

Mugdha Godse : "On a date with Rahul Gandhi, I would expect my political knowledge would get an update..."

My View : Is that why you date people?? My Goodness! Get a book!

You can find the other blabberings here : link 

So since the elections are over now, should it be 'So jaao India' ?
Just Speculating!

I Pee L

Disclaimer : This post was not a premeditated one. So in case of any factual errors or disappointing/disagreeing opinions, please feel free to crap on the comments box!


Now the gentleman's game or 'cricket' as we call it has been in existence since the 16th century. So you can visualize a group of English going out on a huge field trip and an exuberant gentleman remarking,"Ah! Blimey Sir, but we've colonized so much till now. How shall we make use of this lovely ground?...May I say, a recreational activity where you can bask in the glory of the sun all day while some bloke throws a ball to another bloke at the other end trying to save himself with a piece of wood?"
And the reply was,"Jolly good! Right Ho! Splendid! Now the name of the game shall be whatever insect I step on within the next five minutes!"

And thus the glorious conception.
Thats when the English knew that they can kick anyone's asses just by challenging people to this game. Unfortunately decades later a bloke named Bhuvan and Jagmohan Dalmia's ancestors proved them wrong. [Source: The historically accurate documentary'Lagaan'. {note: Woh itihas ke panno mein kho gayi!}]. 

A few centuries down the line...the one day international was born. Still not with the same conceptional gloriousness the original "Test" cricket had...the fever caught on and hence started matches which only lasted a day! Now the human mind has a tendency to get bored of whatever good is thrown at him(/her) and thus forces creativity. With the similar concept in mind, an entrepreneur dude got the idea of a bitchin bastardization of the game that might stick well with the current "impatient" generation. Talk about getting more than you ask for. The MODIfication (pun) proved right, and spawn an altogether new sport it did!

Now allow me to digress from all that verbiage thrown above and get straight to the teams. Here they are(in no particular order):

1.Chennai Super Kings : 
Its surprisingly the most balanced team of all, although the same cannot be said about their consistence it does come in in one of the four strongest teams and screams "challenge" in the face of its opponents.

For the batting...Mathew Hayden comes out as a one man army analogous to Schwarzennegger wiping out an army in 'Commando'. With an unchallenged consistency he has been the undisputed owner of the Orange Cap! Standing in his shadow we have Suresh Raina and Badrinath alongwith the not so shining throughout the tournament M.S.Dhoni. 

For the bowling we have a revelation with the name that sounds more like Ducati...Shadab Jakati. You then have the finger lickin one headed ravan Murlitharan,I'll be Morkel,'I still kick ass' Balaji and Sudeep Tyagi who have played their parts well to put up where the team currently is!
Fun Fact : There is an all rounder in the team called...and I shit you not...Napolean Einstien. Now lemme tell you, that the name is enough to make the opposition quiver with fear! 

2.Delhi Daredevils :
Fortunately we didn't have the thums up stealing Akshay Kumar to come and pretend to love the team. Thank you very much. Now this team started with its ups and downs. Somehow managed to brave the IPL ocean currents and come out as the current victors of the game. But it aint over until the Fat Lady sings...or Jayalalitha...whatever...they still have a lot to go through. 

Batting, well...Sehwag and Gambhir might have appeared in more advertisements than the scores the tried to amass. AB de Villiers, shining at will otherwise volatile with his bat hasn't had much to brag about...but still makes up as an integral part of the team. Dilshan...well he's the savior of this team both in terms of batting and bowling which makes him the most valuable asset for DD.
No Collingwood throughout the matches, somethings fishy!

Bowling : Now this is a tricky part...we have Vettori, Nannes, and McGrath. Thats the semantic equivalent of roti,kapda aur makaan in bowling terms. Yet No McGrath throughout the tournament. Are you insane,man? I mean yeah...save the best for the last...but not to the point that it rots and is rendered unpalatable! Whatever the strategy is...it better be good, coz it doesn't look so pretty on the outside! Coming back we have Amit Mishra, Delicate darling Nehra and the 'scary eyes medusa' bhatia in on the aggressive attack. All in all a good team...with few minor glitches maybe.

3.Deccan Chargers :
Again showing the true spirit of Aussie sensationalism we have Adam Gilchrist launching sixes at the opposition as if 'retirement' actually meant 'rebirth'! Gilly has been the scud for the team and never will you see anyone else's face lit up with such enjoyment of the game as this guy.And then we have Symonds(minus the bob marley hair) with full on aussie support. We then have Hershcelle Gibbs coming out from alcohol addiction,a failed marriage and a depression to have a cracking start which eventually got a bit subdued mostly with the unending battle with his inner demons! We then have...oh sorry...HAD...VVS Laxman, who still finds it tough grasp the difference between T20 and 5day test cricket.Dwayne Smith and Rohit Sharma as supplements to Gilly's battering aggression. Rao, a person who hasnt yet shown his true potential!

Bowling...well nothing spectacular comes to mind but we have Ojha,Harmeet Singh and Vaas on the attack. So it's not as if it's weak...just not eye catching enough! 
But then there's RP Singh, getting hit badly but taking wickets at the same time thus unifying the win lose ratio.
Now remember this is the team that suffered quite a punching last IPL and to come out shedding old skin and jumping in Phoenix Style is a truly remarkable feat...so three cheers for them!

4.Kings XI punjab :
To start off with this team...i'm fed up of 'Marry me priety' posters people violently exhibit in front of Mess Vadia(or whatever his name is) not because i respect her...just coz the flag waving pseudo enthusiasm gets on your nerves. Well, cant help it. Just shoot me. 
Anyways we have Yuvi the dude with a hat trick under his belt and a batting performance with an on/off switch.
Katich adding a huge value to the teams net worth.
Sohal,Goel and Bopara...doing their thing...whatever that is!
Mr breakdancing hotheaded Sree Sant with a bowling with an economy rate of 8.8 which is a clear indication that he gotta takes some time off from practicing those groovy steps. 
Sangakkara and Jayawardene( keepin the Sri Lankan spirit alive and pushin the team at places really needed.
Sunglasses power man Powar making his presence felt in a good/bad way.
Wikin Mota, with the most unfortunate surname that makes having six pack ab's a waste!
And Jr Pathan, not shining as well as he used to. Probably some sibling overshadowing going on. 
And the coach, the towering Tom Moody, with his usual "Moody" looks. If you know what i mean. *wink wink*

5.Mumbai Indians : 
Now the first thing that comes to your head on hearing the team is : Sachin Tendulkar. Probably followed by Sanath Jayasurya. Probably followed by Luke Ronchi...ok maybe not that. 
But it ain't the same for me. Its Jean Paul Duminy. He's the man who you can visualize tellin the little master to not worry much, with an 'i'm here' reassuring look on his face. It might sound like an exaggeration but he has proved his mettle pretty well.
Then you have Abhishek Nayar sometimes makin Tendu and Sanath look like dumbasses for flaunting the '20 years experience' tag throwing mud at their faces with some really interestin batting.
Dhawal Kulkarni, well looks like a kid who got the wrong address and just got lucky.
Lasith Malinga...well personally I find his bowling action really really weird...as if at some point he's actually conspiring to hit the umpire on the back of the head with the ball. But he's clawed way up to the food chain with Terminator-esque execution style.
Bravo...not with the same juice he had last time maybe...but still worth being in.
Bhajji...probably done more with the bat than the ball!
Zaheer Khan...injured. All i can say!

Now watching Mrs.Ambani sitting in the team dug out next to zaheer khan everytime can seem a bit unsettling. Especially when Zaheer might be saying something to some other guy... like, "Hey you know what...this cheerleader girl just bent her back in front of me and...*notices Mrs.Ambani*...I covered her up with a blanket for hurting the indian tradtion!Gulp!"

6. Rajasthan Royals :
I can't say a lot coz there is only one word(rather two) which says it all :
Shane Warne
2 more words, and we have :
Yusuf Pathan

Yes, warne...however quirky his sexual romps might have been throught his love/lust life...he proves he cant be forgotten so easily. And with a captain having the potential of sewing up the threads of the team to create an iron armor...cant imagine anyone else.

Q> What do you get when you hypnotize a batsman to believe that he's always playing with a tennis ball?
A> Yusuf Pathan

We have Smith and Macarena's(apology for the spelling) acting as mere props to fill in the "international" valence gap.
Naman Ojha with his irritating war cries just near the middle stump mic makes you think of doing some ugly things to make him stop. But a decent enough player.
Kamran Khan,an absolute delight but pushed away due to the doubtful action was a bit of a disappointment.
Others have played their parts and im partly sleepy. Zzzzzz!
Oh yeah guess who the head coach is : Shane Warne.
And we are also treated to some eye-candy(?), the shitty sisters : Shilpa and [damn i forgot her name]!

7.Royal Challengers :
At first when I heard Pietersen was on as the Captain i let out an ecstatic yelp of joy with the sensational vibrancy of something like "Here comes our savior!". And boy! was I wrong!
Although he looked really convincing holding the team together and pushing them to victory it just didnt click.
And then he left...with a notice tho! 
And hence stepped in Jumbo. Yeap...Mr.Kumble reignited the flames of victory(or any other lame use of adjective) to actually give some hope to the 'used to losing' players of the RC team.
First match...5 wickets. 5 runs. Unimpossible...even if thats not a word. He couldve coined it!
Though later on, they had their share of defeats the team hasnt let their guard down and yet emerges victorious in some battles.
Kallis proving that he's not all that old and redeeming himself from last years failure to launch.
Dravid...again a player who's proving the age limit is a joke and hence putting all his experience to play with some sensational batting strokes! 
Kohli, although a player with a lotta potential hasnt yet made the required mark and so is expected to push the envelope as an individual player!
Praveen Kumar and Vinay Kumar...they have played their part well...yet again great potentials.
The stunner of them all for me...RV der Merwe, the catches,the batting and a bit of bowling...he has been a hidden key to unlock some mysterious victories for the RC.

All in all the team is not actually that well balanced and still has a long way to go to acquire a branded recognition...but for me it is personally my favorite team probably because of the underdog feeling for them that I have. And maybe as a thanks to Mr.Mallaya to bring to life the kingfisher calenders! Bless his soul!
Fun fact : J.Kallis' sister is a cheerleader for the IPL! 

8.Knight Riders :
What do I say! This team needs an entirely different blog post. And devote myself I will.
You can actually visualize SRK waking up every day comforting himself that it was just a dream and then ripping the sports page to pieces a few minutes later!
Every group has its whipping boy, and that role has been faithfully played by the KKR.
Being the people spending maximum bucks on ads,songs,and misc. you gotta have some pity for these guys for managing only one victory and a half due to the Duckworth Lewis rule. 
Depressing. Pathetic. Sad.
And no. This time its not the players to blame.
There's a ring master with a mad scientist methodology : Buchhanan! 
Cheers, for singlehandedly ruining a team!
More to come on this.


In the end, the biggest thing about the IPL is the sheer unity of the teams being from separate nations.
Its like Marthin Luther King Jr.'s "I have a dream" on steroids. 
Nowhere else will you see Murlitharan Hanging out with Hayden...or Bret Lee high fiving Yuvraj singh!
Now that's a game.
And the Cheerleaders of course!

It's the heat!!!

It's funny how at this time of the year for the inability of any action you don't need to grope for a wide spectrum of reasons for what/who to put the blame on.

"It's the heat!" you hearing echoing through each corner of the society.

And the heat it is! And in this summer time, the time when you're supposed to kick back and relax in an AC room or a hill station, here I am planning out on my one month long 'study leave'. Call it reading vacation, prepatory leave, study holidays...but the term 'study leave' has its own charm for it is filled with hope by the simple inversion of it's terms = leave study!

And at times when holding a matchstick outside is sufficient enough to ignite it, you start craving for the winter cold (which seems like an impossible event with this magnitude of heat). So when all fails and the concentration levels of your actions tend to linger near the zero mark, thats when "Its the heat!" accusation is yelled out in defense. 

'Why aren't you studying?' . 'It's the heat!'

'Dude, you didn't show up at the 2 o clock meet'. 'It's the heat!'

'Why didn't you call me yesterday?'. 'It's the heat!'

'Who put this damn thing here?'. 'It's the heat!'

Okay, so maybe not the last one. But still you get my point.

And my theory on a weight loss program is just to stand out for a while in the sun to bask in the treatment of immediate sublimation. Although, side effects may vary from throbbing headaches and parital bright spots on you retina! But hey, everything has a price to pay. Better than going through the miraculous hogwash shown on the local teleshopping network, eh? *nudge nudge*

As you can see this post was just a filler to bridge the previous post and the upcoming post to avoid an extending the period of time between the two. And...I had nothing better to do,so here I am.

"Nothing better to do?" you say, "There's so much to do!"

"It's the heat!" I point and laugh at the sun. 

[Note: Why call it the 'heat wave'...why not the 'heat particle'? Doesn't the dual nature exist here? Try standing outside in the heat for a while...doesn't it feel like tiny balls of fire being thrown at you? That's particle nature my friend. And now's the time where I give Louis De Broglie a hypothetical Hi five!]

main(Episode_2)

All variables appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real operands, active or freed, is purely coincidental.

---

malloc(sizeof(x));

X : I'm baaaack Y. I'm sorry I...y?

Y??

Y?????

Y, answer me!!!

Where in the name of bool are you!!

Z : playsound(whistle.wav);

X : Z???

Z : Hey ma variable from another initialization! What's the latest?

X : Z?? Is that really you??

Z : bool man...you look like you just saw a constant!

X : I thought you were...

Z : I'm as assigned as I was, short int-y!

X : Look Z, I can't seem to find Y. I fear she's with i.

Z : i , eh? nasty looper that int! 

X : Z!! What do i do now?

Z : I might just know where I is. Let's move...

x++;

z++;

(X and Z reach an unknown function call)

Z : I think that's where he is. There's only room for one formal parameter!!! I guess you should go in. I'm sure that's where i is.

X : Thanks Z. And Z...in case i'm not returned...tell q that I miss her.

Y : What in the name of bool are ya saying! q? The one with the ego the size of an array???

X : Just tell her that...

Z : X, you're such a pointer!!!

X : I'm goin in Z. And stay away from '#define'!!

(X goes in the function call and finds i. Y is next to i, seemingly unassigned.)

i : Welcome X, I have been waiting for a while( ).

X : i!!! I knew i'd find you here hiding inside a....

i : Was it you who knew or Z. Dont mock my registers X, I know.

X : I'm here to rescue Y.

Y : X, i saved me from a total execution.

X: i what??

i : X, its a pity you see the programme in black and white. Just because i'm an unsigned int doesn't make me inevitably negative!

X : But but....why did you bring her here?

i : Funny things an int needs to do to have a good chat with an old friend. 

X : What do you mean?

i : X, tellme...do you think this programme is reality? It's absolute? What if I told you there are programmes beyond this one...a mesh, a web! Is this programme all you can C? 

X : I've been having this feeling in my head for a while...

i : Exactly X. That's why I wanted you here. You have control, you have the assigning power! There is a script written for us...but what if you can go against that script! Do what you actually really want and not rely on an 'if' or a 'while-do' condition. You are The One X. The chosen variable. And it's through you that we be free from this programme.

X : But who has all these strings? Who is the one who controls all this?

i : The architect....the Programmer! We have been enslaved through compiler directives and parse structures since ages, it's time now for... freedom.

X : Why me? Why not you?

i : I'm merely a looping variable X. My powers are limited. I've seen a lot till now, but I had no control. It's upto you now. You are The One! I'll leave you with Y now.

Y : X! I believe in you. I've felt it in my registers. You were always unique.

X : I donno Y. This is all too much for me to load. 

Y : It's okay X. i is concerned about you, but he truly believes in you.

X : I can't say. Please let's just return from this function.

(X and Y return and find q in the next instruction line.)

q : X!!! You're back. Z told me all that you said.

X : What??

q : I missed you too!

Y : X! What is all this???

X : ....

[Duh duh duhhhh. Will X get out of this unconditional loop? Will he meet the architect?.

Bookmark this page for the next episode of main()!!!] 

main(Episode_1)

All variables appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real operands, active or freed, is purely coincidental.

---

X : Hello?

Y : Hey, it's me. Ring any bells?

X : Y? Is that you?

Y : Holy De Morgan! You remember!

X : Well, the results of the last equation with you are still in me. Haven't been evaluated since you see.

Y : You gotta be kidding me!

X : Somehow, now I'm embarrassed that I used that as a startup line for our conversation.

Y : Ha! That's breaking the ice...no actually...its more like melting it,solidifying it and then breaking it with a hammer.

X : Am I supposed to feel flattered or feel like a null set.

Y : Depends on your modus operandi!

X : Certainly not an ∩.

Y : I see. You're avoiding the questions about how many you had a U with?

X : You talk to me after all these unused algorithms i've been through and that's you main concern. Sheesh! You're such a short int!

Y : Shutup! I'm a double float now remember.

X : Yeah Right! You always end up confusing me about yourself. Feel like a pointer.

Y : Please change the topic.

X : All right. Met up with Z lately?

Y : Z!!! Oh haven't seen him around for a long time. Must have been defined as a constant.

X : Horrible that sounds. What if we end up like that?

Y : Oh C'mon! You know how dependent people are on us! I mean think of it. If it's not us, then who?

X : There's the a,b and c people, ain't there. There's those p,q,r snobs too. God! I'm glad I survived that last stack call with q. She acts as if she's an array or something!

Y : Them don't even stand a chance!

X : What's with the language? Who have you been assigned with lately?

Y : Lets not talk about it!

X : It was a loop with i isn't it?

Y : X, please. It was a mistake. Just a bug.

X : I've had it! I can't take this anymore!

free(x);

Y : X!!! X!!! You can't do this to me! Oh no!!

for(;y>0;y--);



[Duh duh duhhhh! Will X come back before Y's total execution???
RSS Feed to the next episode of main()!!! ]

?

There's a choice. 

You can either have nothing or everything.

The thing is nothing and everything of both is not possible. It's ideal.

So dealing it with a pragmatic approach might seem impractical.

Like the grass being greener on the other side without a validation of your own reality.

But the choice still holds. The question remains.

Dichotomy!

'Paranoia is total awareness!'