...obeying the voices in my head...

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Trapped in a NET

[This is a work of fiction. Any resmeblance to the characters living,dead or in zombie state is merely a coincidence and is to be taken in a light manner by kindly smiling at this web page.]

It was a Saturday, 8 pm . Aditya was there, with the best dress he had in his wardrobe, which meant there wasn't much to choose from. But the white shirt and denim jeans with the black blazer on top did make things look fancy.

The hunt began. He wasn't actually invited to the party, but he knew the security was gonna be lax. And gatecrashing was something he mastered in, usually turning up at weddings and ogling at the food and the women. But this was not the like the previous parties. This one was with a purpose. He had an aim. He actually had come close to the word commitment for the task up at hand, but he chose not to use the 'C' word. And also the other thing that was different was that it was not a wedding or a birthday party. This was the 'rich bitch' party, the party where one woman invites everyone existing in her address book so that 1) She can show off her wealth. 2) She can show off her contacts, all the famous people she knew. 3) To come on page 3 the next day. Aditya was the proud human who claimed to have coined the term 'rich bitch party'. The best part was the reason for the party : nothing. In her defense - It was a Saturday, and parties aren't illegal, are they!

The people here were fascinating. Dressed in their best clothes women and men keep coming wondering why the hell they were invited for no apparent reason. While some women were highly intelligent, as their sense of best dressing was highly linked to the adage - "Less is more!" and thus leaving a very little margin of error for the dress to go wrong. These were the usual victims of Aditya's ogling. And the best thing about these 'rich bitch' parties was that these women liked the fact that there exists a man ogling at them. Aditya did start his usual practice with the girl in black. She seemed familiar, and soon Aditya gave his 'hey-check-me-out' look. But suddenly, Aditya coming back to his senses shoved her off his thoughts.

He realized, this was a 'rich bitch' party...and if any woman here knew that he was wearing a cheap imitation of a 'tag heuer' they would drop him like a hot brick. Also, then again he reminded himself he was on a mission. He would have to fight his desires, and face reality. He had his plan rolling in his head, but distractions kept coming. How would he focus!! But then, as his face turned he saw the woman. She seemed different from the usual conspicuously cleavaged women who adorned the crowd that very same room. She had no artificial make up on, natural. Aditya lost track of what his aim was, and was guided by pure impulse.

Slowly like a predator of the Savannah he made way through the hordes of tall grass, the rest of the people. His prey was in sight. His eyes were locked, yet he didn't want the prey to notice. Inconspicuously, he slid through populated barriers between him and his prey and slowly camouflaged himself with the background. Steadily, he drew nearer and closer...the final pounce! As the confidence of being the predator had reached its climax...suddenly he was back to being Aditya again.

Oh shit! he thought, Now what!!!.
He saw a guy with a tray passing by and picked up a wine glass.

Nonchalantly he walked in with an acute air of confidence and the smile of a vacuum cleaner salesman. He twitched a bit on his way, but with his panache he made it look like a complex salsa step. And now he was close. She was alone, with a drink in her hand. The time had come.

"Hey!" Aditya exhaled a ton of breath along with the word and sustained his smile.
She looked around. She put on a genuine amiable face.
"Hello there. Do I know you ?" her voice a musical note in every word.

"Ummm...no. I mean you can't say... right, its such a small world after all. Frankly speaking I was getting really bored and needed to flex my vocal chords a bit, someone to talk to you know. Apparently most of the women here are only concerned about how much worth stuff they are wearing and who'll get photographed next."

"Ah! I see. I find these parties really boring actually. I'm just here to photograph these people. It's my job! God! Given a choice I would rather go to Afghanistan and get photos of what exactly the world is going through. Sigh! They say i need experience first. I don't understand how taking photographs of these --"

"...Sluts?" Aditya the uncrowned oversmart added.

She smiled.
"Well, not quite what I was looking for, was looking for something more polite. He he. But it'll do. So...what do you do?"

"Well...me. I just passed out with an engineering degree. But I barely value it. This was not the line I wanted to follow. It was just flowing with the trend, you see. I'm more interested in the creative stuff you know. Making films, painting, photography--"

"Wow! which camera do you own?"

"Ummm...i have that thing...the Sony Cyber....Sony Cybercrop?"

"Oh! you mean a Sony Cybershot?"

"Yeah yeah! that one. With carl zeus' lenses...crystal clear stuff."

"Carl Zeiss you mean. Good good. I own this piece." She suddenly conjured up a huge contraption which later made Aditya realize that this is what you get when you stick 3 cybershots back to back.
She continued,"Its a Canon EOS 350d SLR. Got it as a gift. Cool na?"

"Awesome. This thing looks like it can actually stop global warming!"

"Hehe! Well what sort of photography do you like?"

"Nature stuff. Mainly clouds. I see patterns in them. You know, Gods geometry."

"Wow! I wrote an article on a web site lately with that title. Amazing! So then what do you do nowadays?"

"Actually I'm doing nothing at all. Taking a sabbatical n all you know. I keep reading day n night though. Started with pulp stuff but now I'm maturing you see."

"Ahhh! Enlightening. So, whats the latest book you're on?"

"Animal Farm by Orwell."

"Me too. I just finished it. Wow! What a coincidence. Somehow I found it a bit sad though. But its nothing compared to--"

"--1984. well, yeah. But somehow I prefer Huxley's Brave new world. It's more...what do I say...refined!"

"Oh my god! That was exactly what I was gonna say. Are you sure we aren't the same person? He he."

We will be soon, thought Aditya. It was working now. Everything seemed under control.

She was utterly floored and ecstatic with joy. It was evident in her eyes. How could she have met such a guy at such a boring and mundane party, it was like a romantic play. Serendipity! Yet she did not reveal it all from her body language. This meant there was still some last magical spell to be chanted.

"Ok now this." She beamed, "Favorite movie?"

Hook, line and sinker. Exactly what Aditya wanted. The final litmus test. The crescendo had been built up now, time for the climax.

"Shawshank redemption!" Aditya gave a highly exuberant smile and felt like beating his chest to signify the fact that he was the Alpha male of this conversation!

But then, something went wrong. Her face didn't light up as expected. Aditya panicked now.
He asked, "What??"

"Oh nothing! Mine is 'The fountain'."

"No its not. Its Shawshank redemption!"

"He he! I'm sorry. You lost me on this one. We were so close to a high score weren't we?"

"I beg to differ here. Your favorite movie IS the Shawshank redemption!!"

"I actually found it boring. It's too slow."

"That's impossible!" Aditya lost control, "Its clearly stated on your orkut profile!"

"WHAT??? Did you just say my 'profile'??"

The ship had hit the iceberg. All that was left for Aditya to decide was how to sink - 1) A grand finale explosion or 2) An invisible and silent bubble breaking with a pop.

"Ummm....no no....I could have said...ummm... pedophile?"

"Could have?? What? You son of a --" she lifted her camera, or so it looked like a machete from where Aditya was standing.

"--hey let's just all be calm here okay!". It's interesting how the word 'calm' catalyzes something that is completely its semantic opposite.

"Calm!! CALM!! I know you now! You're that loverboy_007 guy on orkut right? You do all this in depth research and the hunt women down, dont ya! My freind told me about you. How dumb do you think I am? The nerve of you to send me scraps and a friend request! You filthy PERVERT!"

All the people around them were watching the delightful show. Some of the women just drew close to the 'scene' having high hopes of being photographed for the papers. The problem here was that the photographer was the assailant and the camera was her primary weapon.

Unfortunately, for Aditya he just had the epiphany on why the camera was named a 'Canon'. And he was in it's blast radius.

The was a loud thud.
Nobody died.
Yet there is no record if anybody present in the scene lived happily ever after.

Moral of the story : We live in a world where our privacy is controlled by a check box and a mouse click.


Jagriti said...

...and there is no record all those who read this lived happily ever after..! I'm going to amend my orkut profile right now..!! :)

Man...! This is scary…though what u wrote is a fiction but I'm sure things like this must be happening...

NRkey Menon said...

Well, things like this does happen a lot. And orkut, for one, is not at all short of stalkers. Our lives are are open wide for people to speculate any part they want. Its kind of like an awareness post. :)

Dagny said...

My orkut profile is spic n span :p
N half of those wah pedals wouldn't understand the rest.:P

Good post.

NRkey Menon said...

oh yes, I see.
I wont have many problems tho, usually he girls are the victims.

Jinal said...

good good!!
nice work.